“And don’t you want to be chased?”
“Since we work together, that would be too weird. You could cut Cash out of your life at any time and he wouldn’t put up a fight.”
She had a point. “I’m sure you’ll meet someone at one of our shows. We seem to be getting fans.”
“I better.”
After we had dinner together, Mason went into his bedroom and shut the door. Sometimes he could be moody and preferred his solitude. Desi went to the gym because she insisted she was getting fat. She wasn’t. At all. That left me and Gavin in the living room. We hadn’t spoken since the horrible incident. And I wasn’t sure if I should say anything.
I rinsed the dishes in the sink then placed them in the dishwasher. He approached the counter then leaned against it. He didn’t look at me but I suspected a conversation was about to happen. I sincerely hoped it would be a good one.
I washed my hands then patted them dry.
Gavin cleared his throat. “Can we talk?”
“Yeah…of course.”
“Do you want to get a cup of coffee?”
I didn’t see why that was necessary. Mason was home but he was in his bedroom.
“I just don’t want to be interrupted.”
I knew I needed to repair our relationship to save the band. “Sure.” I grabbed my jacket then we left the apartment. A coffee shop was just across the street, so we walked in silence until we reached it. Gavin ordered my favorite drink then sat across from me.
I met his gaze for a moment before I looked at my hands in my lap. The awkwardness set in. His brown hair was a little longer than it normally was. He was just too busy to get a haircut. His bright green eyes were the same color they always were. Gavin wasn’t a bad looking guy. Actually, there was nothing wrong with him. I just never had the heart to give him a chance—anyone a chance. Cash was the only person who understood exactly what I wanted. It was easy and uncomplicated.
“Thanks for talking to me.” He drank his black coffee then returned it to the table.
I sipped my chai tea latte. “I hope we can work this out, Gavin. If not for me, at least for Desi and Mason.”
He nodded. “I want to apologize—for everything. I’ve been a total arse. And I’m truly sorry.”
Thank god. This conversation was going to go well. “It’s okay.”
“I just liked you so much that I became obsessed. When you hooked up with Cash, it drove me crazy—not that it’s an excuse.”
Definitely not.
“After you broke up with Isaac, I gave you space to get over the relationship. But I wanted to swoop in at the first opportunity. Unfortunately, the timing just wasn’t right.”
That, among other things.
“And now I understand that I’ll never have you. You made your feelings for me clear—and blunt.”
Ouch. “I didn’t mean to be so mean, Gavin.”
He raised a hand. “No, it’s okay. I deserved it. I was being a jerk. I’m sorry for my behavior. But as twisted and dark as it sounds, I did it because I love you.”
He loves me? That part made me uncomfortable. “Let’s just forget about it, Gavin.”
“No,” he said firmly. “I don’t want to brush this under the rug. The connection between us is powerful—as musicians. That bond and trust needs to be there for our music and performances to soar. We had that until I ruined it. I need to get that back.”
“I couldn’t agree more.”
“So you’ll work on it with me?”
“Of course.”
“Because you’re still my best friend.”
“You’re mine too.”
He nodded. “I’m glad we could work this out.”
“Gavin, you’re special to me—as well as Desi and Mason—and I want to be happy again.”
“You’re special to me too.” He took a long drink then licked his lips. “How’s it going with Cash?”
We are going to do this now? I think a grace period would be appropriate. Whatever. “Good.”
“So you like him?”
Duh. “Yeah.”
“Is that where you went last night?”
This is starting to feel like an interrogation. “What are you asking, Gavin?”
“Nothing,” he said quickly. “I’m trying to act like I always do.”
“If you’re uncomfortable with my relationship with Cash, we don’t have to talk about it.”
“But I want to be comfortable with it.”
“You can’t force it,” I said gently.
He sighed. “Do you love him? That’s what I really want to know.”
“No.”
“You’re okay with a summer romance? When we leave, you’ll never see him again.”
“I was aware of the parameters of the relationship when I decided to be in it.” My voice came out cold and I immediately regretted it. I knew Gavin was trying.
“I’m sorry. I’m just concerned for you. I don’t want you to get hurt. You don’t deserve anything less than the best.”
Damn. He could be sweet sometimes. ”Thank you. I appreciate your concern. But really, I’m fine.”
“I’m sorry I was rude to Cash. You were always nice to Brooke.”
Completely different situations but whatever. “Are you going to try to get her back?”
“No.”
That surprised me. “No?”
“I didn’t love her. I thought I would eventually but it never happened. I shouldn’t waste anymore time, especially hers.”
I nodded. “That makes sense.”
“And I want to be with someone that really means something to me.” He held my gaze and gave me a serious look.
I hoped he didn’t have me in mind.
“I know you’re with Cash, and that’s fine. You obviously like him. But…”
No. No. No.
“I really hope you give me a chance later. Maybe when we get home.”
“Gavin…”
“Just hear me out, alright? I’m one of your closest friends. I understand you, what you need, and what you’ve already been through. You don’t need to hide from me. If we have this much chemistry making music together, imagine the chemistry we would have in other ways. I don’t mean to pressure you, but I’ve never felt this way about someone before. I can’t just give up, so to speak.”