“Hey, sweet pea. How you doing?”
She tried to smile, but she felt more like crying.
Garrett sat down on the edge of the bed like Ethan had done the night before. “Hey now, don’t look like that.”
“I’m losing my mind.”
Her voice came out as a sob, and she despised it.
He touched her cheek and smoothed hair from her face.“You’re not losing your mind, Rachel. You’re getting it back. There’s a difference. You’ve been through a very tough time. Most people wouldn’t have survived it, but you did. Don’t sell yourself short.”
Tears gathered in her eyes, and he gently thumbed one away as it trickled down her cheek.
“Where’s Ethan?”
“He’ll be back soon. Want me to go get him?”
She shook her head. She did want him, but she hated the way she seemed to cling to him. Surely she could survive a few moments alone. But then she wasn’t alone. Garrett was here, and he’d been her friend. She knew that much.
“You gave me away at my wedding,” she whispered.
He smiled. “I did. It was a toss-up, really. Dad very much wanted the honor.”
She cocked her head to the side. “Then why didn’t he?”
“Because you asked me to,” he said simply.
“Ethan said I had no family, that I was a part of his before we ever married.” It was voiced as a question rather than the statement she’d intended.
“That’s true. Mom taught you in school. You were always one of her favorite students. After your parents died, she pretty much adopted you into the Kelly fold.”
“So Ethan and I knew each other? I mean before we got involved?” Then she frowned. “Involved” sounded so . . . impersonal.
Garrett smiled. “I’m pretty certain he always noticed you, but it wasn’t until he came home on leave and discovered that our younger brother Joe had asked you out that he got his ass in gear.”
Her brow furrowed in concentration. Try as she might she couldn’t summon a mental picture of Joe or Nathan. “Ethan told me that Nathan and Joe were twins, but I can’t remember either of them.”
“Maybe when you see them it will all come back, and if it doesn’t, there’s no hurry,” he said easily.
“Why don’t I remember them? Or Sam or Donovan?” She shook her head in confusion. “I don’t remember your parents either, and it sounds like I was close to your mom.”
“Give it time, sweet pea. You’ve got all the time in the world now. You have nothing to worry about other than resting and letting us all take care of you.”
“They aren’t...” She trailed off and looked down.
“They aren’t what?”
“Sam isn’t mad because I can’t remember him? Or Donovan?”
Garrett took her hand in his, letting her fingers lie over his much larger ones. “No one is angry with you. We all love you. Sam and Donovan too. They just want you home where you’re safe and healthy.”
“I want to go home. It’s so hard for me to believe I have a home. I used to dream. I thought I made the memories up but now I know they really happened.”
“What kinds of things?” Garrett asked.
She pursed her lips, concentrating on the haphazard images dancing in her mind. “There’s a lake and a dock. I’m barefooted and wearing shorts. You’re standing in front of me and Ethan is behind. I run to you thinking that you’ll save me from Ethan, but you pick me up and toss me into the water.”
A warm smile transformed the darkness of his features. She stared at him in fascination.
“You don’t smile much.”
He gave her a startled look.
“I know that,” she said, “and I also know that you smile for me. I remember that. I remember that I can make you laugh and that everyone teases you about being so grouchy.”
He chuckled lightly. “Yes, I’m grouchy and yes you can always make me laugh. Yes, I threw you in the water when I was supposed to be saving you from Ethan. You paid me back later, though.”
“Oh?” She leaned up in the bed in her excitement. Information. Details. She craved them as much as her body craved the drugs.
“You conned Sam, Donovan, Joe and Nathan into ganging up on me and tossing me into the lake. It took all four I might add, but you got your revenge. I took two in with me,” he added smugly.
She smiled, feeling the wonder of his words clear to her soul. It did sound like she had family, like they were all a family.
And then she frowned again. “Why am I so afraid of Sam? It sounds like I had a good relationship with him.”
“Because you can’t remember him yet. You fear the unknown. You remember me and Ethan so you feel comfortable with us. As more of your memory returns, you’ll remember how comfortable you were with us all.”
She nodded, grasping onto his explanation, drawing comfort from the idea that she wouldn’t be this scared mouse forever. And then she had an unsettling thought. What if she had always been this timid?
Garrett laughed, and she realized she’d voiced the question aloud.
“You’ve always been quiet and shy, particularly around new people, but I’d never call you timid. You fit into our family as if you’d been born a Kelly, and you never took any crap off anyone. No one could survive our family for an extended period of time if they were timid. We’re loud, noisy...”