This wasn’t sex. This was something so deeply emotional that he couldn’t even find words to describe it. He’d missed her with every cell and now she was finally here. A part of him. Linked so intimately with him that nothing could come between them.
He stroked her back, enjoying the feel of her skin against his palms. Then he kissed and nuzzled her neck, just wanting to inhale her sweetness all over again.
“Did I hurt you?” God, don’t let him have hurt her. He never should have pushed her into this, but he’d been helpless to stop it.
She kissed his shoulder and snuggled deeper into his embrace. “You were perfect, Nathan. So very perfect.”
CHAPTER 18
PAIN splintered through Nathan, and he came awake with a gasp. For a moment he thought he was having another dream, reliving his captivity. But he felt it again, a thin blunt object smacking his flesh.
He made a grab for his arm and breathed away the sensation and in the process bumped into Shea’s sleeping form. She lay beside him, curled into a protective ball, the sheets in a tangle at her feet.
She flinched and made a low sound of distress and it was then he realized it was she who was dreaming. She who was reliving her captivity, and he was still so closely linked to her that he felt everything she was experiencing.
His gut tightened in rage and his throat knotted at what she’d endured. His hands shook as he turned and pulled her into his arms.
“Shea. Baby, wake up.”
When he got no response, he called to her with his mind.
Shea. I’ve got you. No one can hurt you now. Wake up and look at me. Feel me. I’m right here. I have you.
She came instantly awake. No gradual climb to consciousness. Her eyes flew open and her breath exploded from her lips in harsh puffs.
“Grace,” she croaked.
Nathan frowned. “Grace?”
She scrambled to sit up in bed. Her hands shook. Her entire body shook. She raised her hands to wipe away her hair but then buried her face against her palms and rocked back and forth.
Distress radiated from her like a beacon. Her shoulders started to twitch and he realized with alarm that she was crying.
Her mind was a chaotic mess. He frowned at the images of her captors and then he saw a beautiful, dark-haired woman. Taller than Shea. Toned and tanned. Just as quickly as he caught the image, his mind went completely blank. Shea had slammed the link shut and closed herself off from him.
It stunned him how empty he suddenly felt. A surge of hurt followed by anger built before he could call it back. It felt like a betrayal. Like she didn’t trust him.
The thoughts were irrational. But he couldn’t turn them off no matter how much he thought she was justified in her caution.
He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do now. She shut him out so maybe she didn’t want him prying. So he sat there, feeling like an idiot as she wept into her hands.
Then the decision was made for him. She turned and flung herself into his arms, holding him so tight that for a moment he couldn’t breathe.
“I’m sorry,” she choked out. “I didn’t do it to hurt you.”
He eased his arms around her and stroked her back, trying to comfort her.
“What the hell is going on?” he asked softly.
“I just didn’t want you to see. It was so overwhelming and I couldn’t shut it off, so I shut you off instead.”
His hold tightened around her. “That’s bullshit.” He took another breath and tried a more tactful, sensitive approach. “You and I are quite a pair, aren’t we, Shea?”
She pushed up to face him, her eyes drenched with sadness and shame. “What do you mean?”
He touched her cheek, his heart growing soft at the sight of her tears. “We both try to hide from the other and yet we have a more intimate connection than any two other people on the planet. You can’t hide this from me any more than I can hide my scars from you. Why would you demand to see my shame and then hide yours from me?”
She sighed and then her lips turned up into a rueful half smile. “I knew it would upset you and I didn’t want to be the cause of that.”
He leaned forward and kissed her nose. “How about you let me decide what I want to be upset about? Damn right it upsets me. The idea of you in those bastards’ hands makes me crazy. But it doesn’t mean you’re going to hide it from me to protect my fragile little psyche. Anything that involves you, I want to know about. Are we clear on that?”
She smiled. “Crystal clear.”
“Good. Now come here.”
He pulled her against him and kissed her hungrily. They’d just made love a few hours earlier and yet he still ached. His need for her defied logic. He couldn’t explain it any more than he could fight it.
Already he was as hard as a rock, his dick straining upward, tenting the sheet that covered his thighs. He pushed impatiently at the covers, not wanting any barrier between them.
He settled her astride his thighs so that his erection rested against the blond curls that covered her tiny mound. She looked so damn sexy sitting atop him, her blond hair disheveled and falling over her shoulders. Her eyes were sweet and sleepy looking, but when he cupped her br**sts, her pupils flared and her eyes went more black than blue.
He loved the feel of her plump br**sts against his fingers. Small against his much larger hands. He rubbed his thumbs over her ni**les, fascinated by the hardening nubs.
Unable to resist, he stroked over her shoulders, down her back then around the curve of her waist and then over her hips and underneath to her bu**ocks. He couldn’t get enough of simply touching her.