“Nope.”
“Sounds familiar.”
I saw the jealousy in his eyes. “Gavin had a girlfriend for the past year. She was a sweet and beautiful girl. He hasn’t been wooing me the entire time.”
“And why did they break up?”
Damn. I couldn’t lie. “He wanted to be with me.”
“And he must have some reason to think he has a chance.” The accusation was evident.
“What are you saying? That I want to be with Gavin?”
He looked away. “Maybe.”
“But I don’t. Right now, I only want to be with you.”
“And what about when you leave?”
I didn’t see why it mattered. We wouldn’t see each other or talk again. He’d be with some other woman and I’d eventually find some other guy. “Does it matter?”
“It matters to me.”
“Cash, when this arrangement is over we’ll never see each other again. So why do you care if I end up with Gavin?”
“You’re right. I’m sorry.” He left my side then sat at the edge of the bed, his face hidden.
I didn’t understand what was going on. Sometimes I wondered if something stronger was between us, but Cash made it clear there wasn’t. But then he acted like this.
I scooted behind him and rubbed his back.
“I’ve grown more attached to you than I expected.”
My hands stopped moving. “I know the feeling.”
“And…I didn’t mean to get angry. I just…care about you.”
I kissed his shoulder. “I care about you too.”
“I’ve never felt that way before.”
My heart raced in my chest, pounding against my ribs.
Cash was quiet for a long time. “Never mind.”
I wanted him to answer, but I didn’t pressure him. “Do you not wear condoms with your other lady friends?”
“No. I always wear them.”
“Why am I different?”
“You just are.”
I kissed his shoulder again. “Have you ever had sex without a condom?” If he’d never been in a serious relationship, I would assume he hadn’t. But he handled himself very well when it was skin-to-skin.
“Yes.”
That wasn’t the response I expected. “With who?” I blurted.
“Pass.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Cash Matthews
What the fuck just happened?
I lay in bed while Prudence slumbered beside me. Her musical sighs and deep breathing kept my heart at a slow rate. But then I replayed the conversation we had, the one where I didn’t sound anything like myself.
I didn’t want her to be with Gavin. Actually, I didn’t want her to be with anybody. And I always wore protection with women. It didn’t matter if we were monogamous or not. A chance pregnancy wasn’t something I could handle. But with Prudence, all my rules were thrown out.
What was happening to me?
I cared about everyone in my life and never wanted anything bad to happen to any of them, but I went above and beyond for Prudence. If something happened to her, I’d never forgive myself. If I didn’t know she was safe, I couldn’t continue. It’s just how I felt. Why? I don’t fucking know.
Anxiety settled on me the more I thought about it. I was jealous, controlling, possessive, attentive, caring, and totally obsessed with this girl. More than I’d ever been with anyone else. The sex between us was amazing, the best I ever had, but I’ve had good sex before. Why was this different? What was happening to me?
I needed to do some damage control after last night. I totally freaked her out. I knew it.
Why did I have to be a dumbass?
I couldn’t believe the shit that flew out of my mouth. I had to make it right before she left. What if she was so uncomfortable around me that she ended our arrangement prematurely? I wouldn’t have her anymore. And the longer I was around her, the more certain I was she would never open up to me. Whatever made her this way, against serious relationships, marriage, and babies, was something permanent. Nothing I did was going to change that. And I knew this because I was the exact same way. We were both broken.
She stretched next to me then her foot wrapped around my leg. It was so soft.
“Sleep well?” I whispered.
“I always sleep well in your Pottery Barn sheets.”
I moved next to her then rubbed my nose against hers. “I slept well too. But it had nothing to do with the sheets.” I kissed the valley between her breasts then returned to her face.
“You don’t think I’m a bed monster?”
“A bed monster?” What the hell was that?
“I don’t hog the sheets and take up all the space?” Her fingers moved through my hair. I loved it when she did that.
“You’re too small to do any damage.”
“Good response,” she said with a chuckle.
I kissed her inner thighs then lay on top of her. “I’m sorry about my behavior last night. I was just…in a mood.”
Her fingers glided down my neck and to my back. “It’s alright.”
“It won’t happen again. The last thing I want to do is make you uncomfortable and chase you away.”
She smiled at me. “You make me come so hard that you’ll never have to worry about that.”
Well, I’m glad my cock saved me. I gave myself another mental pat on the back.
“And you make me too happy.”
Fuck…why did she say that? My heart slammed against my ribs. I couldn’t help myself. Those words made me feel elated, special, and important. I liked it. “Good.” It was all I managed to get out.
She grabbed my face and kissed me. “Now let’s forget about it.”
She always let me off the hook so easily. Prudence was a dream girl, a fantasy, a vision. There wasn’t a single imperfection that marked her, other than her past. Besides that, she was the ideal woman. And I got to be with her—for now.
“Do you have plans today?” she asked.
“Just with you.”
“Good. I don’t want to leave the bedroom.”
A quiet growl escaped my lips. She always knew how to stroke my ego—and make me hard. “We have brunch with my family today.”
“Oh. Damn.”
“But we have before and after.”