“Samantha?”
Hearing her name on his lips struck her like never before. She tilted her head at him. “Do you know something, Blake? You’ve never called me Sam. Not once. It’s always Samantha.”
His brows drew together. “What’s that got to do with it?”
Everything.
She wanted to be Sam once in a while. Sam the woman who’d left her ordinary upbringing in Pasadena to embrace the excitement of Vegas after a one-sided love affair gone wrong. The woman who wanted to have a purely physical affair with a man she admired, without ever risking her heart again. Not Samantha the personal assistant who helped run his office and his life and who kept the whole lot in check for him, all nice and neat and tidy, just the way he liked it. She couldn’t believe she’d actually thought she’d had a chance with him.
And he was waiting for an answer.
“I have my reasons for resigning and I think that’s all you need to know.”
“Is someone giving you a hard time?” he asked sharply. “Someone from my family? I’ll talk to them if they are. Tell me.”
She shook her head. “Your family’s great. It’s…” She hesitated, wishing she’d given herself time to come up with a suitable explanation. Needless to say, she hadn’t expected to be here tonight writing out her resignation, or that he’d even come upon her. She’d assumed he’d probably go off nightclubbing with Miss Hollywood. “I simply want something more, okay? It’s nothing against you or your family. This is about me.”
One eyebrow rose. “You want something more than first-class travel and a world-class place to live?”
“Yes.” She had to tread carefully. “Actually I’m thinking of going home to Pasadena for a little while,” she fibbed, then realized that wasn’t such a bad idea after all. “Just until I decide what I want to do next.”
“And that will give you more of what you want? I seem to remember you saying you’d left Pasadena because you’d been looking for more excitement.”
She’d definitely said that—and she had been looking for more than weekly piano lessons and weekend shopping with her girlfriends—but it had been so much more four years ago. Having fallen in love with a young architect who’d gone off to travel the world after she’d told him she loved him, she’d decided to find her own excitement. Her job with Blake had provided that excitement without any emotional involvement. Until now. And even now it was about lust, not love.
His eyes pierced the distance between them. “You seemed happy enough before to move to Aspen.”
“I was… I am… I mean…” Oh, heck. She was getting herself tied up in knots. When Blake said he was moving back home and she should come with him, she’d been delighted. His estranged father’s will had stated all the Jarrod offspring had to return to Jarrod Ridge for a year or lose their inheritance. Blake, being the eldest—only by a few minutes ahead of his fraternal and more laidback twin, Guy—had taken up the challenge of running the resort.
She’d looked forward to it, too, and they’d been traveling back and forth between Aspen and Vegas a couple of times these past four months, getting everything sorted. Blake would keep his hotels but would spend most of his time in Aspen. She’d been very happy with that. Until tonight.
She cleared her throat. “All my family and friends are back in Pasadena. I miss them.”
“I didn’t know you had any friends.”
She pulled a face. “Thanks very much.”
There was a flicker of impatience. “You know what I mean. You’re always working or traveling with me and rarely go home except for the holidays. Your friends have never been a priority before.”
“I guess that’s changed.” Thankfully Carl had never returned and she’d heard he’d married an English girl. Of course, time and distance had only shown her that she hadn’t really been in love with him at all. She’d been in love with the idea of being in love with a man who’d talked of adventure in far-off places. She’d thought they’d do that together. God, what was wrong with her that she kept wanting men who didn’t want her?
He held her gaze. “What are you going to do after Pasadena, then?”
“I’m not sure. I’ll find something. Perhaps even one of those rare friends of mine might help me get a job,” she mocked. All she knew was that she wouldn’t continue working for Blake, not in Aspen nor in Vegas. A clean break was needed.
He eyed her. “You have plenty of connections. You could use them.”
All at once she had an ache in her throat. It sounded like he was beginning to accept her decision. And that more than anything showed he really didn’t care about her. She was just another employee to him. Nothing more.
“I’m thinking I might get right away from this type of work.”
“And do what?”
“I don’t know.” She took a breath. “In any case, I’d really like to leave Aspen as soon as possible, so that I can wrap up things in Vegas before going home. It shouldn’t take more than a couple of days.” She’d make sure it didn’t.
He scanned her face. “You’re not telling me everything,” he said, sending her heart bumping against her ribs.
“There’s nothing else to tell. I do have a life and a family away from you, Blake, as hard as that may be for you to believe.” She couldn’t take much more of this. Going over to the desk, she picked up the letter. “So I’d appreciate it if you would accept my resignation.” She walked toward him. “Ideally I’d like to leave here as soon as possible. Tomorrow even.” Reaching him, she held out the letter.
He didn’t take it.
There was a measured silence, then, “No.”
The breath stalled in her throat. “Wh-what?”
“No, I won’t accept your letter of resignation and certainly not on such short notice. I need you here with me.”
His words sent a jet of warmth through her until she remembered this evening. It had been torturous watching him and that actress flirt with each other. How could she stay and keep up the pretence that she didn’t want Blake for herself?
She continued to hold the letter out to him. “I can’t stay, Blake. I really need to leave.”