His pulse pounding in his ears, he cut the engine and turned to look at Rachel. She looked as nervous as he felt. His chest caved in just a bit at the brave set of her lips.
“Rachel. Baby? Do you still want me to make love to you?”
His palms went clammy and slid over the steering wheel. Before he asked, he’d had no idea just how afraid he was that she’d back out. He’d understand. He’d wait forever if that’s what it took, but he wanted to be able to touch her again more than he’d ever wanted anything else.
She turned, and her eyes glowed softly in the dim light cast from the porch lights. There was much reflected in the pools. Fear, hesitancy, hope and desire. Determination.
“Come inside with me, Ethan.”
Her husky voice sent a shock wave over his skin. His groin tightened until he shifted to alleviate the discomfort. She reached for his hand, her fingers trembling against his.
He laced his fingers with hers, twining them tightly and squeezing reassuringly. Finally he raised her hand to his lips to kiss each knuckle.
“Let’s go,” he whispered.
They both opened their doors and hurried for the porch. When he fumbled clumsily at the doorknob, Rachel leaned against the entryway and dissolved into giggles.
Surprised to hear the joyful sound, he stopped with the door cracked open. Her eyes twinkled merrily and she gasped for breath as she held her stomach.
“What a pair we are. Is this how we acted when we dated? Nervous as two cats and so eager to get to bed that we trip over ourselves on the way in?”
Ethan grinned, and then a chuckle escaped, followed by outright laughter. The tension evaporated, and he leaned against the door as he wiped at his eyes.
“I guess we do seem a little desperate. Well, I do. Leave it to a man to get all antsy when sex is mentioned.”
She grinned again and shoved her hair away from her face. “Well, I’m glad you’re a normal guy. Would be hard to seduce you if you never had sex on the brain.”
Unable to resist her any longer, he pulled her into his arms and tucked her head under his chin. She just felt . . . right. If only he’d seen that before.
He closed his eyes and chased those memories away. Not tonight. Not when everything could be so perfect again.
Shoving with his shoulder, he opened the door and tugged her along behind him. Cognizant of her unease with the dark, he immediately reached for the switch, flooding the living room with light.
He touched her again, more to reassure himself than her. His fingertips grazed her cheekbone and then cupped her jaw.
“Wait here. I’ll come for you in a few minutes. I want this to be perfect for you.”
She cocked her head to the side and looked at him in confusion.
He smiled and leaned in to kiss her nose. “Indulge me. Let me try my hand at romance and all the stuff women are supposed to love.”
The trust in her dark eyes humbled him. Made him want to be better. To be worthy. Not to let her down, damn it.
He turned and hurried into the bedroom. He stopped in the middle of the floor and turned in several circles, looking, not sure what he wanted or where to find it.
Candles. Rachel loved candles. She always had several scattered over the house.
Where the hell were they now? He hadn’t thrown anything away, but Ma had come over and boxed a lot of stuff up. No way he wanted to be rummaging around in the garage when Rachel was waiting for him.
The closet.
He yanked open the door and flicked the light on. Several boxes were piled in the back. Hoping the candles were in one of them, he dragged the top one down and pried open the top.
He huffed in frustration when he found assorted knickknacks, then he opened the second box. A light floral scent wafted up as soon as the lid flapped over. Inside were several candles in varying sizes. Perfect.
He grabbed as many as he could carry, then went back into the bedroom and placed them strategically around the room. Satisfied with the placement, he went back to the kitchen for matches.
A couple of minutes later, the bedroom was alight in the warm glow of a dozen candles. It wasn’t the most perfect setup, but it would do.
Now to get Rachel.
Dragging a hand over his hair and then down the front of his shirt, he sucked in a breath to steady his bounding pulse and walked back into the living room, where Rachel stood at the glass doors looking into the night.
He came up behind her and slid his hands up her arms and over her shoulders. Her hair fluttered and caught the light. He stared for a moment and then leaned down, nudging her hair aside with his mouth as he nuzzled the side of her neck.
Her soft sigh of contentment sent a wave of satisfaction over him. He loved the softness of her neck and the silky short hairs at her nape. And her smell. So feminine and light. He inhaled deeply and kissed the area just behind her ear, enjoying her betraying twitch.
“Come into the bedroom with me?”
She turned and twined her arms around his neck, leaning up on tiptoe so her mouth was close to his.
“I’m so nervous,” she admitted. “I want you to know that. I’m not afraid. I know you won’t hurt me. I’m not even sure why I’m so anxious. I want this so much, but my stomach is fluttering like crazy.”
He stroked her cheek, tracing the lines of her jaw and then her lips.
“I’m nervous too, baby. We’ll be nervous together. This matters. We both want it so much. We just need to relax and take it slow. Take it together.”
“Oh, I like that,” she breathed. “Together. Make love to me, Ethan.”