A second laugh bubbled up. “You’re already labeling it that way?”
“Well…” He looked around, but no one was near. His hand lifted.
I didn’t look. I didn’t know what he was gesturing for, and I didn’t care. He was right. We were two minutes from walking right back outside, and I wasn’t going to regret it. I couldn’t. This power, whatever he had over me, it was making me do things I never thought I would. But after this past year—I didn’t care anymore. The pain. The sadness. The loneliness. I wanted it wiped out, even for just one night. One goddamn night.
“We’ve just met,” he continued, his voice dropping low. “There’s a lot we don’t know about each other.”
“You know where I live. Do you live there, too?”
His eyes grew hooded. “There are things about my life I can’t share. I’d like to, but I’m in a position where I can’t. Not until I trust you.”
“You can’t tell me where you live?”
“No.”
“You’re unbelievable. You want to have sex with me, but you won’t tell me where you live?”
“I’m close to Dorian.” His hand rested on the table between us. It curled into a fist, and his jaw clenched. “That’s all I can tell you right now. But I want to tell you more.” He leaned forward. His hand stayed there, still balled up. “I really do want to.”
“You have a job you can’t tell me about. You live somewhere you can’t tell me about, but you can tell me you’re friends with my building manager? What am I supposed to do with that?”
“I was hoping you’d give me time. I can tell you; I just can’t do it now.”
A month ago I would’ve laughed in his face. Hell, two weeks ago I would’ve laughed in his face, but this wasn’t two weeks ago. I had endured an entire week of wanting to see him, be around him, but I had been too scared. Tonight was different. Sia had stood me up. I couldn’t blame her. She had a life. She was out there. She was living, and I hadn’t been. I’d been holed up in my house, and now I was holed up on my floor. I’d been healing—or was it hiding? Thirteen months, and one meeting with this man set my world ablaze.
I was smart. I was educated. One-night stands weren’t me, but looking back at him, I was quickly losing my capacity for rational thinking. My body had made up its own mind.
Thump.
I couldn’t believe this.
Thump.
My pulse pounded in my eardrum.
Thump.
He was waiting for my response.
I sighed, then nodded. “Okay.”
Cole got up to check on the restaurant for his friend, and when he came back, we left. We didn’t touch on the way out. We didn’t need to.
I was already imagining him over me, sliding inside, thrusting and pulling back, only to go deep once more, stretching me. The ache between my legs wasn’t going to go away.
The drive was the same. I didn’t see the scenery. I could only concentrate on his hand. He positioned it on his leg, half turned up. Maybe it was there for me to hold if I chose. A part of me was glad he didn’t put his hand on my leg. The other part of me wanted nothing more. And when my mind continued its play-by-play of what would happen once we got to my place, it got to be too much. So I tried to change my thoughts.
Sia.
That picture of her and Jake at the hockey game flashed in my head. My body cooled, just a tiny bit. But then Cole reached for the stick shift to change gears, and I went right back to fixating on that hand—what it would feel like, where it would touch me, how his fingers would be inside of me.
I was wet, beyond the point of embarrassment.
“You okay?” Cole’s voice was soft.
I looked up and nodded, seeing his desire. “I am.”
He held my gaze for another second before turning back to the road. I was reassured. Any tiny doubt that might’ve tried to tunnel its way into me was stopped in its tracks. I was ready.
Instead of parking in front of my building, Cole turned to the side street and pulled into the parking lot. Really? I smiled. Yes, he could say again that he knew the code and the parking lot because of Dorian, but I suspected it was more. Too knowledgeable. Then he wheeled into the building manager’s slot. It was labeled on the pavement. I didn’t know what Cole did, but he was someone.
He got out of the car, and I didn’t wait for him to open my door. I climbed out, and we walked beside each other to the elevator. The closer we got to my place, the more my blood pumped through me.
Once inside the elevator, I stood to one side, watching him. He returned my gaze.
We still did not touch.
My chest tightened, hoping no one would call the elevator at that moment. We sailed past the lobby, the second floor, and stopped at mine. I put in the code, and the doors opened to my home.
I drew in a breath, filling my lungs again. God, it was time.
Stepping out with shaky knees, I bypassed the light switch. The full moon lit up my entire floor. I went to the kitchen and paused at the island. “Did you want something to drink?” I caught sight of the tequila and wine on the counter. There was more than enough.
Cole stepped up behind me and followed my gaze. “Were you going to have a party?” he asked, his breath coating the back of my neck.
I shivered, closing my eyes for one delicious moment. “I stocked up. I thought a friend was coming over tonight.”
His hand rested on my back, nudging my sweater aside to touch my skin. “He?”