“Under the circumstances, it seemed the smart thing to do.”
“You don’t want to marry me.”
She wasn’t ready for relief. She couldn’t tell if he’d really gotten it or was just testing her. “I don’t want to marry you.”
Jon shoved his hands into his pockets and walked around the car. “I talked to Elaine last night. All night. She pointed out I can’t force you to. Even if I could, it would only lead to disaster.”
Maggie had a feeling she was going to like Elaine. “I have to take a lot of the blame,” she said. “I should never have mentioned you walking away from the child. That’s not who you are. I’m going to guess that made you think I planned to shut you out, which you reacted to.”
“I didn’t like it,” he told her. “This is my child, too.”
“I know. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.” He looked at the car. “It’s not much to look at now, but you’re going to make it beautiful.”
“That’s the plan.”
“We went out to dinner. The city seems nice.”
“I like it.”
He stopped in front of her. “I love her,” he said with a shrug. “I really love her. It’s different, Mags. I can’t explain how it’s different, but it is. I want to be with her every second. I think about her when we’re apart. It’s exciting and new, but it’s also comfortable. We’re the same in ways you and I never were. I love her and I want to be with her always.”
Maggie swallowed. “I’m happy for you,” she said, and meant it. The only hint of pain came from the voice inside that said she would like that, too. Not with Jon, of course, but with someone.
She thought of Qadir and how the handsome prince had stolen a piece of her heart. The problem wasn’t her feelings for him but his for her. Did he have any? Things had changed for her but she had a bad feeling they were exactly the same for him.
“I won’t cut you out of the baby’s life. I swear. If that’s not good enough, and I understand it might not be, then I’ll sign something. We’ll figure out a plan. You can have summers or weekends or whatever works best. But don’t lose the love of your life over this.”
“You’re right,” he said, words she couldn’t ever remember him speaking.
“I know I’m right,” she teased, to keep the mood light. “Now go find your woman and take her until she’s boneless. Then tell her you’re sorry and that she’s the one you really want to marry.”
“I will,” he said, and hugged her.
She stepped into his embrace. Everything about it was familiar but none of it was what she wanted.
“If you need anything, I’ll be there for you,” he said when he released her.
“I know.” She stepped back and smiled at him. “Thanks for being willing to do the right thing. Even if it was totally crazy.”
He smiled. “You have to admit, I have style.”
“Oh, yeah. Now go find Elaine and tell her she owes me.”
“Love you, Mags.”
She believed he did love her, the way she loved him. Like an old friend. Jon was a warm memory from her past and she would never forget him. But he wasn’t the one.
“I love you, too.”
She watched him walk away. Elaine would be waiting, praying that she wasn’t about to lose the man of her dreams. They would talk and kiss and make love. If Jon was smart, he would propose and they would fly home blissfully happy. It was what Maggie wanted for them. She sure didn’t want Jon for herself. But that didn’t make her feel any less alone.
Maggie spent the day feeling restless. She gave up working on the car early in the afternoon and went for a walk in the garden.
There were hundreds of different plants, trees and shrubs and she doubted she knew the names of any of them. Still, their beauty calmed her spirit and the perfume of their combined scents helped her relax.
She walked along the various paths, taking turns she never had before. She found herself next to a high wall. A soft cry came from behind the stone. Someone was in trouble!
“It is not what you think.”
She turned and found Qadir standing behind her. Her reaction was, as always, instant and powerful. She gave in to the need and rushed into his arms.
He held her tightly against him, rubbing his hands up and down her back. “Fear not,” he told her. “I am here. I will slay your dragons.”
If only that were true, she thought as she held on, never wanting to let go. “I’m sort of dragon free right now,” she told him.
“Should that change, my sword is at your disposal.”
She stepped back and looked at him. “You have a sword?”
He raised his eyebrows, which made her laugh.
“Not that,” she said with a smile. “Do you have a real sword? You know, made of metal and all sharp and shiny.”
“Of course.”
“Then I’ll let you know the next time I see a dragon.”
He took her hand in his and led her closer to the wall. “The crying is not what you think.”
“It sounds like a kitten is lost inside. Or someone is in trouble.”
“Sometimes it sounds like a child. Instead there are two old parrots. The last of them. These walls hide the harem garden. Many years ago, when my great-grandfather kept women here, parrots lived in the garden. Their cries concealed the voices of the women so no man would be tempted to climb the walls and claim what could never be his.”